The Basement Lounge
The Basement Lounge

Season 1, Episode 9 · 3 years ago

"Food Is The Hardest Thing In The World To Change" with Betsy Cox - EP #9


Betsy Cox is a Louisiana girl that moved out west and became a comedian...and a vegan.

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All you got to do is record a script kind of like what I'm doing now, throw it onto your show and start making money once again. Download the anchor APP or go to Anchor Dot FM and get your podcast career off and running right now. Just do it. Already. Hey guys, this is Mike and Before we get the show started, I wanted to let you know that you can now join the basement lounge team by supporting the show on Patreon. Right now we have a one dollar tier that is so full of cool rewards you'd be a fool to pass it up. Just go to Patreoncomlash Basement Lounge pod to sign up right away, and now on with the show. Grab a drink, pull up a chair and settle in, because you're in the basement lounge. Hello, everybody, and welcome to a brand new episode of the Basement Lounge. This is the cool, relaxed space where we sit down with Comedians, actors, musicians, anybody working in entertainment who's got a story to tell. And today we've got a very special guest. You may have seen her around the La area. She is an actress, a writer and a comedian. Her name is Betsy Cox. Betsy, welcome to the show. Thanks for having me on the show. You are so happy to have you. You I was. I do a little bit of online stocking for of everybody before I bring them on, because you know that's what we do. Your website blinging betsycom. First of all, let's just ask where does where does the blinging betsy handle come from? Hey, you know, it's really funny, Mike. I'll tell you. I started and account a hundred years ago on twitter and that's the cost was taken and I was like, Oh, great, who am I going to be? And I love to wear like shiny, glittering clothes. I'm always buying in around. Sound like I'm gonna be bullying in that and I just don't. And I chucked it all these years and when, I think, came out, added it to my instagram name and now I'm just bling in that page. I love it. It's it's very you. I I'm a sucker for a literation, so I like that as well. You anybody who's followed betsy on instagram. You are always just dressed to the nines, rocking the jewelry, rock rock in the the heels and the dresses, and and and and dress like a superstar. Would it be safe to say you're a bit of a Fashionista? Yeah, I love fashion, but I also really like fun. You know, I'm a girly girl. I like to dress up, but I love like fun, crazy wild things. You know, I mean, I feel like a lot of a lot of people like right, but I just really love like crazy, wild, interesting fashion, like she's with bows on them or like silver gold all over us. I've been scratch scrolling through some of the photos here and and to say you like the wild and the wacky stuff is a is an understatement. You mean, we've got you dressed like a full on Las Vegas with the girl with the with the feathers and the wings and and just all of it. Yeah, the feathers are from a show I did. It was a really it was a big theater production. You might know it. It was on it was an off board way show brook part getting years ago. was called pieces of ASP and then they brought it back for a ten year anniversary and you know, I just in for it and I got to do it. It was crazy, such a cool show and I did all the bit parts coming out between each piece that goes rat. It was really fun. So I got to wear all these crazy outfits with this perfect for my personality. That was that was a cool show. We're before. I want to I want to get more into the into into the show and kind of what it's about and how you got involved with that. The want the one image that seems... come up a lot, that we see in a lot of your photos and seems to be you just Google Betsy Cocks and it pops is is you wrapped up in caution tape? Oh yeah, yeah, what's the story behind the caution tape? Here's a story by that. I am a little bit of a dumb blond. I like this. I'm not quite thought, you know, and grow it up. I was kind of like, you know, and you know it's very close to my stepdad would like it, you know, just such a funny, fine step that I had. So I was trying to think of my email tag and I found a sand cost and blond thinking and I showed it to myself. Done that. said, my email pag in hee was dying. He's like secty. That is so you. So when I started doing comedy, I do all these shoots, you know, finding photo shoes, and I thought, you know, I could make a dress out of cotton tape like the blonde is thinking. That's what I came about and I really probably posted a picture two times and I get asked about that more than Kiney fixture on ever taking. It's the COUTON tape, it's it's, it's, you know, it's become it's really become a part of a part of your identity. It seems like it's what people seem to associate with you now. Yeah, totally, totally, like cautions, here she comes. So yeah, so the pieces of as show, like like what tell me about this, like how'd you get involved in it? Like what's the show about? Like we're did, what's that story? Like? You know, that story like kind of interesting. So it's pieces of ASS is. Like basically, it was like it was a show that was based around girls who were, you know, hot, a good looking and the things that they face, because people look at pretty girls to think that they have it so easy. And all these girls, some of them were very gramatic, like you would fly through some of them, and then some of them were just hilarious, you know, and the things that they went through in their lives and things are happened to them. So you could kind of normalize and see that no one had an easy life. Is the same for everyone, and everyone kind of had their backstory and their pain, you know, and things about them, you know that they went through in life just like anybody else, and that was the base of this the show. That was just the start and every girl told their story about, you know, a school being taken on our you know, having that being happened to them through their life. And then, very deep in between parts where I would come out in the show and you blond jobs like this but in a very funny way, rewrite articles that like you know or negative swords, putting them in. It was really just quite a goot. So that was the kind of the basis of the show. That it was a huge it was probably at an eight hundred feet theater and it just was a huge, wit heart event. It was such a fun, good trying and you got to learn about all these people their actresses in it. And a friend of mine called me and said, years ago I did this show called pieces of us. You may have heard about a book work within it, like a lot of big sectors of right here to go and they're bringing it back and I think you should audition for this specific role. And I said sure, I'll, you know, spend my stuff over and it's like me, Su're all going to meet with them and ID im that was them, for coffee and then they brought me into like a little theater auditioned and then they were like, you know, we love you, we think you're crazy, like you got it, and I was like cool, and then we were hurt so long and put it up and you know, you mentioned the show being about, you know, the stories that all these all these different women have experienced, some funny, some not so funny, and and getting to have that role like yours, where you're you're almost kind of your the your the palate cleanser, you're the your the tension breaker between the between the segments, between the bits. It's no secret to anybody on the Internet Betsy Cocks is a very beautiful woman and working in entertainment, betsy as that been something where you've had to experience maybe a piece of ass story of your own that maybe I don't know if you got to tell them as part of the show or maybe one that you could have as that been something you've had to experience yourself.

You know, I think everybody has the pieces of a story. I mean I think everybody in the world has like a story. I you know, it was interesting because I would you know, the girl that was the break in between I've always been super ducy and I like to be a light room. You know, Notnot, but they actually after I did the third show, just you know, it's really interesting because my part wasn't supposed to be the star of the show like that. It was just like the break in between the pieces, but it turned out that my part was the biggest comedic part. They were like, it's not supposed to be funny, but everyone was lave them and then they said me, maybe you should do it peace because this turned out the so well. And you know, they keep they canceled after that that one. They were going to start putting it up for a yearly. They decided not to and they ended up not doing it. But you know, I didn't know. I was kind of born on it. I would want to do a piece and talk about that or you know, there are a lot of things. I think about doing a one woman show and I kind of have a title and I have a really good story, but a one woman show comes from, you know, the truth of a painful place and then it's you know, it's kind of like a comedy that comes from that. That be interesting because I really did like being the comedic break in between the I like to entertain and, you know, be funny and Doozy and wild, and so looks been interesting. But yeah, they did want you to do a piece and yeah, I mean of course I have. You know, I would have a lot of stories. I grew up, you know, do for for with a single mom. Told on mom that my step down and even when you're not my step dad, we didn't have a lot, but we had each other. So we were very I'm very close to my sisters and my mom's and yeah, there's a lot of pain and growing up for I mean it's really hard. you kind of teas all the time, you feel like an house chast and it's just, you know. I mean I think everybody has sprees like that. I think that's what makes the people we are gay and like the people who have the hardest story. That's probably the people that want to inspire other people and bring people up and make people feel good. I mean, I like to get on speech and make people laugh and make them forget about whatever happened and they're day, you know, and let's just have a bit time together, because, you know, that's really what life is about. I feel like that's a really great. It's a really great way of looking at it when you can take your own experiences, be they good or bad or somewhere in between, and and find a way to turn them on their head, kind of kind of take the power away from them, so they don't so they don't so they don't run your life, so that you still maintain, you know, that level of control. Yeah, and that's exactly what it is. I mean really, you know, things in comedy you talk about, those are things that you're like teasing about yourself. Take it at yourself for that. Other people relate to that. Other people are like, you know, if I do like aging jokes, but who are like getting older, like, you know, I got to worry about my hus I have to worry about this. I'm saying it for you. You don't have to say it and I'm saying it, and now you don't have to feel bad about yourself ful feeling that way, because every woman felt that way, you know, and now we can all relate together, laugh about this, have a great time and feel better about ourselves and just know that, hey, goldist thing is this. He built the same way and that's what sort of school is, because I feel like people coming together like that and getting someone saying what everybody feeling just lightens everybody's like up and like comedy so powerful and and now that, now that we've kind of transitioned into talking about doing comedy, let's let's let's really delve into that. So what I always ask all of my comedians when they come on, I'll come on the show, is is how and when did you get your start doing comedy? You know I'll tell you and I did right in one of my right up and it's a really crazy story. I I didn't realize I was a comedian growing up. I was I was every character of my family growing up. I would fit in the kitchen and while at dinner and I would stand up and be my st up dad and then I would be my sisters and then I would be my mom and I would do conversations between all of these people at the same time. But I just never thought of that as comedy. But I knew I wanted to model. It's what I want to do. I love taking pictures. I love taking pictures because I love looking into a camera and I love...

...creating a world that I am looking into and when that shot to snap you look at me and you see the world from my eyes. I there's something so magical about taking pictures to me, and I love seeing that. I love seeing the beach by the sun, and those are the things I'm thinking about when that cameras snapping at me, or seeing like a world out there, something mystical, are laughing at something that I think it's funny, while the cameras taking pictures. But I will tell you this model is worked out so well for me. I did not look a lot of jobs, so I started taking acting classes and through an acting class and acting each others, like you are a comedian, like you step on stage and you are so odd, you're crazy and you don't even know that your being is because you're just awkward, like you should really be stand up. Then I tried it and then I had had, you know, I had my brother passed away, you know, and then I met my husband, got Mary, my step that I got really sick and ended a passing away of cancer, and it's like to cut a lot of things and light. And then I started to do in these videos with my sisters and I'm still doing get and I did UST be and the classes and I was on a little indie and top team and that, but you know, I'm going to do you see it up again and when I start doing it again, I'm just going to hold for it and kind of what happened, just going to keep going and that's what I've done for about two years now and I hadn't even taken a break, and it's just that's basically my story. And comedy like I'm just going and going and going, like the energize the funny and it's just been a really fun, fun, exciting ride it. I you know, and I'm with you there. I started doing it relatively young. I started when I was in high school and I'm kind of going ever since and it's one of those things where it seems. It seems to me like like comedy is one of those things where you're either hooked for life or you never go back to it again, and you can always tell which one you are based on the first time you think about quitting or the first time you actually do quit. I quit a one point in college and within a year I was right back to it. I couldn't stay away. It's like it's like an addiction or it's just it's just something that pulls you in and we talked about getting bit by the comedy bug all the time and I think people who have never been bitten by it or have never, never had that Hook, don't realize just how much it reels you back in, no matter what you do. It's definitely doesn't even. And it's so interesting too, because you know, everybody has a bad night up. Look, do you know? Sometimes you just have that night you're like not feeling it, you're so tired. Even when you have that bad night, still got to get back on face tomorrow. So it's interesting. It's just totally trapped you and hooks you. So I do feel like that. When I first did it, I just didn't I felt like then, my I did not have a voice. Then I did not have something to say. I couldn't find something to say or you know. I mean I had good sets that we're doing great, but I just wanted to say something else. And today, being a little bit older and not in my s is like I feel like I have a lot more and I'm a lot stronger of a person, although I'm not going to say because Cook work since the age of a leaving and I've always had like a trouble type of life. I've always been a strong, like top, you know, not break me down type of person, but I don't know, I'm more in my feet today. If that makes press no, it does make sense, and I we had a woman on here the beginning of the beginning of the year named Jodey McDermott. She started doing comedy just in within the last few months and you know, she's she's at that age now where her kids are grown and they're moving out and they're going on to do her thing and she kind of described it as like her, it's almost like like a renaissance for her life. It's like, you know, you put certain things on hold when you you get married or you have kids and life kind of life kind of takes over in your priorities change, but when you get to that point where you have that freedom again, it becomes a matter of okay, now what do I do with myself? And in her sin and in her case, it was look at all these years I've had with a husband and two kids and a job. What what about? You know, she was able to find find the funny in that and the experiences in that that that led to you know, writing jokes and telling jokes on stage, and for you, it sounds like you kind of had the same thing growing up...

...with the family that you did and the experiences you had and how you've been able to kind of, like I said earlier, you know, turn those on their head and and find a way to make make those make those situations in those stories more than they may have seemed at the time. Yeah, definitely so with with you. You know, you mentioned. You mentioned growing up growing up in a tough situation, you know, financially, coming from a blended family. So where is? Where did all the you know, because you're in out in Los Angeles now, but where was home for you growing up? Oh, I'm some people believe me. INA are okay, we got a southern girl. All right, all right, all right, yeah, all right, I'm a Carolina boy myself. So let's let's let's, let's talk seafood or no, you're a Vegan. I think that bag. You're a Vegan. Yeah, you are full interesting because I you know, clearly I'm from New Orleans. I definitely was not always began, but it's funny that. Yeah, I moved to La and I had vegetarian friends and I had gone vegetarian a few times and I think cutting the cheese is what helped me, you know, thankfully, because cheese is like thank you, it's so bad for you. But yeah, I just you know, I've turned into a total callie environmental. I'm a huge animal animal and then it's like it's so funny because I thought I got to write just about that. Growing up, you're never even thinking when you eat meat you're eating an animal, and then when it would you start to think about it. As I got older, I was like, Oh my God, but it's so crazy because today, you know, it's today, it's so different to me again compared to twenty years ago, like they have all these impossible burgers that taste just like a real burger. It's it's crazy. So have you? Have you tried the impossible burger yet? Yes, I've tried. I've tried everything. Do I eat that all the time? No, probably not much. And now, for any reason, I just, you know, kind I'm really a probably because my mom's growing up with you like face. I grew out even so much salad, and I am a huge like salad psycho, like I'm always like, let's go get a huge salad. But yeah, I know I did eat the impossible about and I love French fies. I mean I'd rather eat French fries than anything anyway. I remember I remember Kevin Smith telling a story about when he became Vegan and he said the greatest day of his life was when his wife reminded him that peanut butter and Jelly was Vegan Garret. I know people always like what are you? I'm like, well, I eat apple salad, I eat Sur fry, I mean I eat everything you eat, just without me. I've, you know, I've thought about it, I really have. You know, I'm in my s now and I'm trying to be a little more health conscious and mostly because my doctor said I have to be. And you know, looking at those looking at those options like, you know, could I? Could I go without the meat? Could I try and start off slow? Because I guess I, because I do love salad. I love a good salad. I eat a salad for lunch just about every single day. But again, I'm a Carolina boy, so you know, barbecue is kind of my jam. That's kind of my thing. And being here in the been here in the Midwest, which is just corn and cattle country. But would you know, my uncle went vegan and and he said the biggest thing for him has been bacon. He gets and he gets those those Soy Bacon bits and puts them on everything because he said it's just it's it helps. Yeah, I think. You know, I really do think the cross over foods. there. You know what it is. I'll tell you. I really do feel like food. It's the hardest thing in the world to change. It's the hardest thing be to change, because gets a habit from the day you were born. So it's like breaking a lifelong habit. It would be like if you were doing anything you would do from the day you're born to a hard habit to break and it's still normalized to do it. So it's been a challenge and I will say I did do it slowly, like I thought. Even read meeting fork and I didn't eat that. So, like you know, fifteen years and I really don't like but I really don't even like like chicken...

...and turn. I didn't like to want that stuff, and so I don't. I mean, but I did like to eat like when I was grown up. I do eat bacon cheeseburger, since seafood was really hard for me because I love crap. If that's what I grew up eaten all the time. But you know, it's interesting to take little things out and just try it. And I will tell you this, ever since I became Vegan, and I feel bad, I never I used to be like, I gotta like eat. Help you this week with my jeans are right now. I'm going the same size jeans as I was in high school. I hate you so much for that. And I never go. I got a diet. I'm doing it like I'm always. It's not a thing I ever have to think about it being ever. It's so crazy. I think about it all the time. I think about losing weight all the time. Yeah, I never, I never have to eat. It's not even a thought. But I'm like to start. So what's that? That that you have? You know, you've made the the epic lifestyle change of becoming a Vegan. Vegan or not, everybody's got there. Everybody's got their vices. What's your what's your biggest food vice right now? Like, what's the one thing? No matter what, you just can't you need it. Yes, yeah, Yesh, yeah, you know, it's funny. I used it for a while. All my friend here will drink diet and I was doing that for like years. But I want to do is soap tell whenever I do it. So I'm a coke. II Work in television and whenever I meet somebody who tells me, I had somebody who's, like I said, they like I don't drink coffee or tea, and I'm just like, I don't. I don't understand what that's like. I can't imagine living like that, like without that regular caffeine source. No, I'm I'm drinking a coffee right now, on my second one, but only your second. You're slipping her. You come on, get on it when you know it's so funny is that. I had to. I had to stop drinking coffee these past three I was up to like four or five coffees a day and then sometimes a coke at night. I was like, okay, that's you gotta call them down, girlfriend. I'm trying to like keep it to like you know, I'll coffee or two a day and the coak or two or something like that. But you know how it is when you do in comedy. It's like you know, I know a dog clothing line with my sisters, depus dogs. We were just on the news. We were on Ktla here in lost angels and we did a new segment on our Bejian dogs clothing line. And it's so funny because you realize you like work all day and then you've got to be on at night when you're getting on steet and even when you're not doing a show, you're doing all these workout rooms, testing new material all the time. You do in two or three at night. So I have up to drink coffee to stay up, like I'll wake up the six of the morning, the feeds myst five, God, go back to three, four an hour, get up, post on Instagram, get my day started, work it and then the comedy at night. And then it's like every day that that trifle goes on. And with the with the comedy scene being what it is out in Los Angeles, you know. I mean it's pretty busy out where I'm at, for a being a small Midwest town, but out in La, you know, is there like a certain level of maybe pressure or something you feel or intimidation you get just from the fact that it's the La comedy scene. It is well, the La comedy probably the hardest. I mean I some people say I mean York. It is hard to you know, big, big cities like this. But I think that I really use think because I really use I run my own rate, you know, I get try to do the best I can be. I just don't try to like compete with where everyone else is or look at what everyone else's feel bad about myself, because everybody is where they are supposed to be and you'll get to the level when you're supposed to be there. But I do feel like there is a lot of pressure all the time on writing new material. But I think that's more or less thing for me. I feel like I have a you know, I mean I see comic to the same set for years and they don't really change it up and I think that's fine. But like for me, I like to like change it up and have this and have...

God and have new jokes that I'm working in all the time, you know, when I'm trying to build a bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger. Said and for wet, there's pressure with that, but if you if you don't live, you can't write. So ill also and try to like balance, like doing fun things, going out and enjoying life, you know, and and I think that's something that gets that gets missed a lot. We've talked about that on this show before with other comics. where the you know, the worst thing that can happen is for comedy to start feeling like work, you know, when it feels like a chore and it feels like something that you have to get through as opposed to something that you get to go do, is when, I think, you really I think a lot of that comes down to either reevaluating your process or reevaluating your approach to the whole thing. Let me just tell you that is called a what that every comment, I'm sure, gets into. I know I can speak for myself and say that I totally get trapped in that. What it feeling like? The pressure like when they got to get a right? I need you just to speak or over got I should think of anything because I'm putting so much pressure on myself. And I do think that when that happens, it's time to take a vacation. It's time to get in the car and drive somewhere and go for a night or two, for three, whatever you need, because one shot. I just recently felt like, oh my God, like it was like strussing me out and I was like I got to do this and I got it and I was so busy with everything else and all the pressure, and I went to Europe for two weeks, I came back and I am like dancing around the stage like a freaking doll Awina. I'm having such a good time again. I'm like this is who I am, you know, and I just feel like, I feel like that's everybody and everybody today we work so hard, we put so much pressure on ourselves it's crazy and we take the fun out of things just because we're sowing our heads. So I think stepping back and like, even if you have to take a meditation clap or General Line and doing a lot of pace and just like take a deep us and remember like this it's supposed to be fun. And when that goes why would you want to do it? You know, yeah, it and and come, and this is coming from somebody right now who I don't I don't get to go up as much right now just because of because of, you know, work and life kind of getting in the way, which is part of the reason why I have this show. You know, it's one of those where I hate to be away from it. I do miss it, but at the same time, you know, I can also look at where I was at up until the part where I had to the step away from it and, you know, I definitely can tell that I was getting to a point where I was so you know, I kind of got I kind of got in that mop in that period where, like I had, I had I had a tight five and I was it was a relatively new set and I was kind of beating it into the ground and I kind of realized I hadn't done like new, any new bits, in like months. And so take taking the opportunity to step away and kind of Reho, like you said, just take get out of that Rut for a little bit and come at it from a new angle. I think is is going to be really beneficial to me eventually. And so I completely understand where you're coming from. As far as the taking the vacation kind of thing. Yeah, sometimes, and even sometimes don't get on stage for a week if you need a dam break, you know. And sometimes, you know, things fall flat because in you know it's because you're like totally overworked, exhausted, you're working it too hard and you need to just let go and then you need to just get back to who you are. It's really interesting. I mean I just find you know, even in a little bit of time that I've been back on stage, it's just so interesting to see. You see the biggest comics have a bad night are you see them get and then you see them kills the next night. It's just comedy is such a weird deep but I really do think it's all. It's all inside of you. What's coming out? You what I mean to apear in like a dress. Well, what are you like? I've been working the same thing. I'm over it, take a week off and then get excited about saying it again because it's going to come across different. It's such a weird thing, but I just don't but that is a part of it that I am obtruck with. Two it's like getting into the point of like keeping it fresh, getting up every night and feel like you're just a rippin your set and like, you know, creating a party between you and an audience and like feeling like Y'all are just a bunch of friends at the people you know what I mean, and that is that is the part that's obsessive. But but you know, and...

...then there's that time when you're just like, Oh God, like I need to do something, you know, I need to work off the material, and that those two parts are like it's like the dark side and the light sign the side like you know, it's just they tie. You can easily fall to theo. Don't know. I don't know how to decide, but it's crazy, but you get so in love with doing it and then you fall into the trap of you know, that part that's part of like the struggle, the writing in your head. You know, it's crazy. I don't know, it's crazy. Hey, everybody, I just wanted to take a moment to interrupt the show and have a very special shout out to the people who support this show every month on patreon. I want to shout out Whitney Latin and my mother, Melissa Shay, who every single month help support this show. And if you want to be one of those awesome people, all you got to do is go to patreoncom Basement Lounge pod and join the onedollar tier. It gets shouted out on the air. Get your namest it in the description. You get early access to all these shows commercial free. Who our Patreon, our SS feed and so many other cool rewards. Once again, go to Patreoncom Basement Lounge pod, join the onedollar tier and help support the show. Speaking of the show, let's get back to him. We we have these every Sunday. We have a big showcase at the club here in town called the while he's comedy club, called while Sunday comics, and before everything, the show starts at like zero. And so every Sunday before the show for about two hours, we have the comics get together for a comics hang and it's supposed to become like a group writing sash and kind of a way to decompress and get the jitters out before before the show starts. And one thing that were that the lady who runs the show is starting this month is a kind of workship, workshops about just doing stand up in general, and she wants and this this week's topic is going to be about show and stage etiquette. And so would you do you think there are maybe some some types of stage etiquette as far as being a comedian that should I maybe are really more important than others, or maybe need to be focused on that maybe have gotten lost in recent years. Huh, it's a good question, right, age etiquette? You would never do something that I would ever think about, right. Yeah, she posted we have our we have our facebook group for the local comedy scene and she had she had posted that, yeah, we're going to do a thing about stage etiquette this coming Sunday and I read that I just thought to myself, it's it's not something I've ever thought about, but now that I do think about it, that's kind of a fascinating thing to think about. It is a fascinating thing and I just yeah, I well, I mean, probably don't read the crowds. I Shit, I don't write. How I guess I always hate when you see as somebody. You can always tell someone who's experience from somebody who's new based on the single anybody who ever mentions a tough crowd. It just Oh that I've been doing this so long that that just that that boils my blood instantly. Yeah, yeah, I mean it is into yeah, totally, but it's interesting to think about that because I don't know, I never even thought about it. I don't even I feel like I'm such a crazy part why I'm just I don't know, it's that's interesting. Stays Atiquet, you should call me off the vodkast and don't go on. That went so all right. Well then, let's let's, let's, let's, let's, let's move on to something else here. So let's, let's, let's get personal a little bit, betsy, let's get let's, let's dive deep into betsy cocks. So you, you mentioned. That sounded a lot dirtier than I meant for it too. So, Betsy, you you mentioned that you're married. How is how long you been married? I've been married for a get the hell out of town, really, yeah, in La, Tom Telling you in La to be married for a year. I've been married from in here.

So where did you in the Hubby meet? I was working in a bar nice and he came there with a bunch of friends and he sat at my table and I was like, you guys want to do a shot, and we all got a thought together and he was making fun of a big mark for and I thought he's like, my husband is such a funny guys. Like yeah, and I was like all the other boys. And then from there I had dated so many weird guys here in La I was like, Oh God, is it? What is wrong with this guy? What's going to be wrong with this guy? But now, after like dating him two or three months, I was like, I'm probably guy a hundred percent. That's any right after really, after only three months, that's that's crazy long. Only because I yet never, I never ever felt that way. I never had a relationship longer than six months. Before I met him. I dated everyone for two every month and I I am so long. Oh that's fantastic. And how is and I mean I would assume he's as far as everything goes, he's on board everything. You've been married eleven years. Be kind of Shitty if he hated, if he wasn't on board with the with the comedy thing, to be kind of that's something to talk about in therapy. Today's thirty in the morning. I waked up for work and I'm like, Oh my God, shop, so talk to You's ready to kill me, Holf Din, this is not all rain, but no, he's like, you know, I needed great and he's supportive and it's just such an opposite walls from what he does. He's been, you know, does like he's like a business guy. So it's really funny and he's been he's so funny. I'm always like Hey, is this funny? He's like you should work harder. I'm like great things does he? Does he still come out to shows and stuff? I know I never let him from out. Oh, you don't let him, I never. First of all, he's you have a sleep at the time the show topice work and he's a huge mountain bike R so you'll like go mountain bike and then I'm not trying to get him and eat. It's like thirty nine and you know, but I don't really says. I don't. It's not like it's weird. It's like, if I would like, I wouldn't go to his office and sit and watch him talk about all day. You know what I mean, right. And I do run all of my comedy by him, because a lot of him, a lot of it. I am talking about, you know, just about marriage and this, and I'm like, Hey, listen, do you mind, like I have this joke about you know, I do this. You know dose like that. I was like, Hey, look, I want to say this about you. Do you mind? Like I like I like to keep her husband scared. I have about it and I'm like I like to find kid marks and the husband's underwear because gonna know who's so sparity Shit. Like I need to run by him because I'm like are you going to kill me? And I think he's like you like funny and I like cool, that's so great. Yeah, there is also that wine as like, like, I respect my husband. He's a good guy, you know, he's a he's always been very good to me. I don't want to make them feel like you know, I'm so I will ask them like you care? If I say that I got, will just shake or whatever, and he's always like Ussy, that's so funny, like I don't even know if that's actually really funny. I'm not cool. That's fan. Yeah, that's fantastic. I always have to make it clear to any any of the women I've dated, you know, like you know when you're there's always that moment of you know, you meet a girl, oh you're a comedian. It's like yeah, and you know, just letting you know if this continues to be a thing, you know you're gonna come up and you know it's kind of the only warning you're gonna get. Yeah, you're not not like you know, like you mentioned, like you know, you still want to keep it respectful, but I feel like whenever you've got a friend or a loved one or whatever the case might be, he's a comedian, you have to be prepared for the fact that you know you're gonna cut there. They might make a joke about you at some point in the future, especially if you do stupid shit. Totally totally. It's hard because a lot of...

...people would, wouldn't you know, and try the things people wouldn't like, you know, to have that light you know talked about, but I feel like, you know, if you're a secure person, you're like whatever, I don't give a shit. You know what I mean? It's I feel like, you know, if you need a girl, she do sicure. So, like, say whatever you want about me, who care? I don't care what people say. You Care What people say about you? I don't. Not Particularly. No, I mean one of my favorite things of this past year was we did a roast for a guy in town and was some of the stuff they said about me absolutely brutal and true? Hundred percent. Did I laugh my ass off the entire time? You absolutely, I did. Right feel if you get pissed off at a roast, you shouldn't be there. Yeah, you should probably not find it like I people things about me like this. They can pick in like do can all the time. I'm crazy, you know. That's you didn't touch on this. I'm like, Oh, yeah, I'm a little bit of an idiot. I even get on staying a little bit of an idiot. I didn't. You know, like I, tonic is also ticking on yourself, but it's not like you're just, you know, picking on your to have part of it is, you know, all fome back to you. Right. Oh, did you're talking? I trust me. I've gone. I've gone to competitions with nothing but material about how much of a fucking loser I am. Trust me, it's a I have a black belt and self deprecation. It's if I ever, if I ever actually start dating somebody again. At this point, my career is fucking over. What do you you know? We live in it. We live in a weird time right now. We see it all the time in you know, on twitter and on the Internet. You know, Eddie Murphy recently came out and apologized for the material he did like back on his raw special and you know, I think I think you'd be. I think it's there's definitely a line, a fine line, but a line onetheless between you know, we say all the time. You know, was what they were did they were they making a joke, or where they just being an asshole? And I think nowadays, the way comedy is, it's getting harder and harder to make that distinction. But it's also getting harder and harder to walk that line because of the way that just the way people perceive things nowadays. Has that been something you've had to kind of work around yourself? Well, I definitely think you know, no, not so. But there have been things that I'm like, I wrote this show like like is it too dark because of what goes on today with, you know, bean, like there are things like a lot of comics do match eater Jose. I wrote the thing that that's the scariest thing, you know, that I was ever scared of, is like a shooting, but you know, you know, and they're like, but now I'm scared of like twenty year old bag and movel life away my heart, you know, because when you get older, it got excuse me for a younger woman, but it is interesting because you start to think like do I want to say on says? What if somebody can't was affected by that. Look, there are a lot of jokes that go around and a lot of jokes that sometimes I friend that but then they end up being funny, but at first it kind of like they're like the topic and I do feel like it's there's the world. It's so crazy right now. There are a lot of sensitive things. You know that that it's you know, a lot of comics still find ways around doing those tapes of things and making them fine, but it's hard. It's I I probably would choose not to talk about certain topics that to be super sensitive because, you know, it is just the I mean, it would depend on how you felt about it, probably, but I do think it is a really hard trying right now comedy, like it really really is. I mean now it's like the most sensitive time in the world. That a crazy I'm not supersensitive. So you know, seeing probably don't put again. Some people want, though. I guess you see people in crowds like screaming. Sometimes it's something sensitive is said, but I you know, I don't know how to know it's. I do you feel like I don't probably try not do and I will do a joke and stay in a workout where like two dark, Jew dark. You know. Yeah, as people it is it is a weird time now. You know, we you know, we're here in Dayton, Ohio and you know we had a we had a mass shooting... a little over a month ago and it was, you know, the day after the El Paso shooting and you know it, but but it's a weird time here. You know, the day before day Dave shop you know, Dave Chappelle's from this area. He still lives around here and the day before his special dropped on Netflix, he held a huge outdoor e Bay. They basically shut down all of downtown Dayton and Stevie wonder was here and Kanye West was here and he has his Dave Chappelle kind of MC this whole big outdoor music and entertainment event and you know, the idea of kind of bringing the city back together and, you know, getting some new life into things and and that was great and you know he was kind of being hailed as this hero and then it was just so weird to see within twenty four hours his Netflix special dropped and everyone kind of kind it turned on him for the stuff that he talked about in his special and, you know, it just kind of goes to your point earlier of just it's just it's crazy how how much they you know, how a single issue or a single you know, just a a joke or a comment or whatever it is, can things can flip flop so quickly. Yeah, it's so it's so interesting to see. It's like, you know, it's just and I don't really you know, it's I can't say that it's such a bad thing that the world has gotten sensitive, because we need more of a sensitive world because there's so much that happening. How many confident people. But a joke is still a joke at the end of the day. Yeah, you know, a joke is still a joke and I don't think that if he need a joke that in faulted someone. It takes away from the kind heart that he has, you know what I mean? Yeah, clearly someone who does something like that for community has a really kind, caring part. So, you know, you have to be able to appreciate the king the two. I mean, you know, yeah, it's tough, you know. I mean, yeah, I don't know, but I I can't say I think basic ality. I think you'd be hard for us to find anybody who didn't feel the same way. I mean, look where the guy is done with his life or crying out loud. Yeah, it's incredible to see someone like that like how and how successful. But but I did see that he had, you know, how that big, you know thing and had all these people come out and I thought that is so cool that a guy like that does something like that for a community. That's what I thought when I thought, and I had seen one of the top couple of comics that I knew that would they're on Instagram, and I thought this is so amazing and cool. So right, I mean, yeah, I think people need to understand, like I think it's a hard thing to understand that, like a joke is a joke and it doesn't change the current heart that comics has. And you know, that's a clearly a good hearted, sensitive person. So I mean, and if you need a joke, that attended you. I'm sure he's very sorry. We are. We're kind of we're starting to run out of time here with with with Betsy, and it makes me sad because I've had so much fun talking with you today. Before we do and things. You know, this is the one. I always like to give everybody a chance to to direct attention to things they have going on. So right now, blinging betsy cocks, the floor is yours. What have you got going on? What? Where can people see you? Where can they find you? Plug, plug your shit, lady. Well, I'm going to slug. Alex Thomas is show. The funny don't stop. So I'm on it now as a cohost on Tuesday night on gas video from eight to nine thirty, and it's they have the youtube channel the show from lip to watch it every Tuesday from eight to thirty. If you're going to Instagram, you can go out in the poll and then call in. And Alex Thomas is a hilarious comic and the show is so much fun and I'm too excited that they brought me on to be a part of it. So check it out. The funny don't stop. Still. It's Alex Thomas's radio show. It's terrible and everybody, if you're at if you're if you can listen to that, make sure you tune in. Listen to Betsy, listen to listen to the show. It's guarantee you're going to have a lot of fun with it. Betsy cocks that, I cannot thank you enough for coming on the show today. I means a lot to me and I had a lot of fun and love to have you back any time. I loved it and you keep in touch now, oh you...

...just let me know. Absolutely. Guys, you can find betsy check out her website, blinging betsycom. You can find her on Instagram at blinging betsy. Caught is bad. Bet. Help me out here, Betsy, I'm tongue tied. Yeah, allerd, blinging betsy. You, guys, will not regret it. Make sure you check out the radio. If you're in La, go see you're performing somewhere nearby soon. And as always, guys, you can find me online. Go to my website, Mike Shay comedycom follow me on twitter and Instagram at Mike Shay comedy and for all that good stuff. Don't forget, if you'd like to be a supporter of the show, you can support it a patreoncom slash basement lounge pod in the event you feel like giving me a dollar every month, because I talked into a microphone. So, with that being said, guys, thanks again to Betsy Cockstra coming on the show and we will see you guys again next week for a brand new episode of the Basement Lounge. Until then, as always, live well, rock on, take care and BUBBA.

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